Month: December 2020

I visited Milton’s home to meet his parents right after Christmas. I had previously met his two sisters who lived in Fort Worth. On our way back to school we spent several days in Little rock for him to meet my family. All went well in both instances.
After we returned to school Milton began acting very differently and finally confessed that he was having some doubts about our relationship. This began right at the time we were preparing for finals. Consequently I did even worse on them than I had expected to do. It didn’t help that he had confided in another student who then happily relayed that information to me. Had it not been for the period of real searching for God’s will concerning Milton’s place in God’s plan for my life, I would have given him his ring and gone home. But, I was so sure that I decided to stay at Seminary, but to work on campus and not enroll in any classes. If things didn’t work out, then I would go home.
After two agonizing months during which I developed nervous disorders and lost ten pounds I followed the advice of my “Job’s comforters” and did indeed give him back his ring. However, I could not refuse when he wept openly as he gave it back to me. Since that time our love has grown and deepened and I can’t really regret those two months of misery. We made many adjustments during that time that most couples have to make in the early years of marriage. It was much easier knowing that I could give him his ring back and go home. I do regret that my Seminary preparation was so affected by these difficulties.
When I began working full time on campus I became Dr. John Drakeford’s secretary and receptionist for the counseling center as well as working for Dr Boyd Hunt. During one of the Seminary’s Missions Day held during chapel, Milton made his decision to volunteer for overseas missions. This confirmed my conviction that our engagement was the right choice. As the end of the semester neared, Milton and I had several premarital counseling sessions with Ralph Edwards and Bud Fray in the counseling center. Our sessions with Bud Fray were after Milton had made his missions decision and he was most helpful to both of us.

Summer came and I went home to work in the offices of The Arkansas Gazette and plan a wedding. Milton stayed in Fort Worth to complete his thesis and take comprehensive exams and graduate. In God’s timing, Milton was called to be the minister of music at Immanuel Baptist Church in Savannah Georgia, beginning on September 1st. Our wedding took place on August 2 at Calvary Baptist Church in Little Rock, my home church, and was performed by the pastor Rev Paul Fox. My friend Lillie played the piano, and Milton’s friend Edwina Thedford sang. Following the wedding we traveled to Eureka Springs for our honeymoon. Afterwards, we spent several weeks with Milton’s parents in Louisiana before traveling to Savannah, Georgia to begin our life and ministry together.

In September of 1961 Barbara Corrington and I were reunited on a train bound for Fort Worth, Texas and Southwestern Baptist Seminary. We both had stayed in Barnard Hall, the women’s dormitory, while attending Mission Conferences and were not looking forward to living there. I knew there usually were not many girls right out of college (in fact, I remembered seeing only older women.) Then there was the stigma of being a Barnard Hall girl. I had heard the stories about the boys from Fort Worth Hall (Men’s dorm) coming over to check out the new crop of girls only to find a crop failure.

Barnard Hall was even worse than I had remembered it. When we walked into our room the first night, we literally fell over one of the beds. We were moved to a larger room, but it was no less dreary than the first. George Watanabe, a college classmate assumed the responsibility of seeing that we met the “right” people. Since there were several other girls right out of college, not to mention the girls at TCU, we had more competition than we had expected,

I had been rather overweight in college and discovered there were two kinds of boys there-the ones I didn’t want to date and the ones who didn’t want to date me. Having lost a lot of weight between college and seminary, I had more of a choice and dated more. This was before the days of Naylor Student Center and Doris Norton, so those who didn’t date had almost no social life.

Early in the year at a Mission Fellowship social, I discovered one Milton Lites. At the time he was wearing jeans, which I detest, and a big Western hat, and was singing with a “western” group. (quartet.) In spite of all of this I was very impressed. When I asked George about him, he only said “Lites doesn’t have it.” Every day I am more thankful that I had never had much respect for Watanabe’s opinions.

If I were completely honest, I might have to admit that I chased Milton until he caught me. We chatted from time to time on the campus but didn’t really meet until about a month later when he asked me to sing in an ensemble which he was directing for a play. Our first date was for a football game on October 16.

I was not a good student in Seminary before I met Milton, but after we started dting I found it even more difficult to read six Study Course books, draw floor plans for Beginner Departments and memorize the Kings of Israel very night. I had laughed many times about people in college who would not even date a person who was not a mission volunteer. Their opinion became more apparent to me as I became more deeply involved with Milton. I knew he was dedicated to doing God’s will whatever it was, but had never felt any definite leading to do mission work. I prayerfully explored every thing he said or did related to missions. He was active in Mission Fellowship and had been very impressed by the work Rennie Sanderson was doing in music in Japan.

I had moved my church membership from Poly Baptist Church to Eagle Mountain Church where Milton was serving as Music Director. On the Sunday after Thanksgiving we had a deputation team from Mission Fellowship at Seminary to conduct the morning service. I had prayed many times for God to show me if Milton were not the right one, but not until that day was I able to say and me “If he is not a part of your plan for my life, today will be the last time I will date him.” My answer came as clearly as though God had spoken to me. And later in the day when Milton asked me to be his wife I could say “yes” with the assurance that this was a part of God’s plan.

There were several other couples on campus who also had brief courtships and made engagement announcements about the time we made ours. Mrs. Martha Washington Allen, our Resident Counselor and Dean of Women at Seminary was quite upset about the turn of events, and when I showed my ring to her she launched into a sermon on the subject. She ended it by asking me “My Dear, have you prayed about it?” I replied, “Yes, Ma’am, twenty-four years.” This little exchange has become a legend in Barnard Hall and is recounted each Christmas as diamonds begin to flash in the eyes of its residents.

My Senior year began with a BSU pre-school retreat. It was there that I really became friends with Barbara Corrington (now Mrs. Jack Tolar, Jr.) Our friendship was to deepen with many experiences shared throughout the year. I had been elected President of the campus YWA and that year was filled with activities related to the office. We had a successful Big Sister-Little Sister party at the beginning of the year. We also sponsored the Lottie Moon Week of Prayer and Offering on the campus. This was a most rewarding experience, although it was not as successful as I had prayed that it might be. My mistakes, which were numerous gave me a more realistic self-concept. It was in November of that year at the BSU state convention in Hot Springs that I became convinced that God was calling me to prepare for overseas mission service. I made my decision public in the final service of the convention and wrote to Miss Dawkins of the Foreign Mission Board after I returned to the campus informing her of my decision.

Dormitory life was an important factor in the process of my education. I enjoyed it although I was not always blessed with the ideal roommates or neighbors. Even then I thought it was just possible that I was not the ideal roommate or neighbor. Our room somehow became the gathering place for whatever floor or wing we were living on. I like to think that the handy half gallon of peanut butter which we always kept on hand had nothing to do with our popularity.

During my Senior year my roommate, Lillie McKnight was President of the Women’s Student Government and I was Secretary of the same group. This really frustrated our Resident Counselor because she didn’t know who to bring us up before when we had midnight pizza parties in the basement kitchen or moved the giant Christmas tree from the first floor parlor to the third floor. I was grateful that the Dean of Students had a sense of humor.

One of my responsibilities in WSG was to plan and direct the receptions following student recitals. At the end of the year I could have written a book on making punch. My favorite was the one to which I forgot to add sugar. Had it been the Religion faculty instead of the Music faculty I probably would have been dismissed from school for spiking the punch.

My student employment was as secretary in the Student Senate office., Dick Norton had been elected President of the Student Body and I was looking forward to working with him again. However, he was stricken with meningitis in the early weeks of school and we had to hold another election. Unfortunately, I served as a campaign manager for the loser (again) and working with his opposition was not the most pleasant task I have every had. Happily, at our last meeting we had a good laugh about our differences and parted friends.

Our BSU director that year was Linda Day, who had graduated from Ouachita the year before. We had become fairly close friends during my Junior year, even though she always managed to start dating everyone I expressed an interest in. I had attended the Missions Conference at Southwestern Seminary again, and came away convinced that I should serve as a BSU Summer Missionary. At the Council meeting where we were to elect the nominees from our campus, there was almost unanimous agreement that I should be one of those selected. I say almost because Linda Day was not of the same persuasion, and of course those whom she suggested were chosen.. this probable was one of my greatest disappointments. I did feel much better about it when the boys from our campus were selected and served so well.

This must have been my year of “pert nigh but not plumb,” as we say in Arkansas. I was nominated for Who’s Who, but missed it by one point. I was selected to represent our class in the competition for Queen of Play Day. The queen was chosen on the basis of the number of points her class accumulated in the activities during the day. We tied with the Junior Class and I had to share the “honor” with their representative.

As graduation neared I began to wish that I had the security of a teaching certificate. I knew that I needed to work for a year or two before going to seminary. Since Ouachita offered only a few very general courses in Religious Education, I was not very well prepared to assume a position in a church. However, I did go to a Baptist Church in Texarkana as part of a revival team with the possibility of being called as youth director. The committee seemed interested and contacted me several times after that weekend. It seemed fairly certain that they would call me, but at graduation time, I had not heard from them. The same church was considering my roommate Lillie, as organist, and she was having the same experience with them as I was having. I received a phone call from the chairman of the committee about three or four weeks after graduation. After I assured him that I definitely would not be going to seminary in the Fall, he assured me that it was all but settled. I never heard from them again. I finally took a secretarial job with the Arkansas Fair and Livestock Show and later started working at Kempner’s, one of the better stores in Little Rock. I had worked there during the Christmas holidays for several years and my sister had been with them for almost twenty years.

I continued to live with my sister and attend Calvary Baptist Church. I worked with the GA’s, taught a class of Junior girls, was director of a Primary Training Union Department, and sang in the choir. In my spare time I dated a boy who also worked at Kempner’s Department Store.

In the summer I returned to Little Rock where I was employed as a typist for Southern Equitable Life Insurance Company. Again, I joined Calvary Baptist Church and found several places of service. I must admit Calvary seemed so good after attending the churches in Arkadelphia. I belonged to the First Baptist Church there through each college year except for one semester when I attended Second Baptist Church. Many Sunday mornings found us in the Presbyterian church.

On the advice of my pastor, Bro. Fox, I changed my major from English to Religion. I enjoyed the courses, especially those taught by Dr. Vesper Wolber. Is was especially comforting to have him in the class where there were only two or three girls and about thirty ministerial students. I ‘m afraid I didn’t appreciate all of the latter group as I should have. I dated some of them and found it rather difficult to fight them off for thirty minutes and then have to pray with them in front of the dorm for another thirty minutes. Neither activity has a place in my concept of what a casual date should be. It came as a great relief to renew acquaintances with some of the boys in seminary an find that they were really very fine people.

IN the fall semester of my Junior year I pledged the WCF social club. My ministerial friends disapproved of the clubs and made life rather miserable for me during pledging. With the encouragement of Dr. Phelps, the college president, I managed to make i through the two weeks. However, being a member was even less enjoyable than being a pledge. The club contributed very little to my developmeny; even less than I contributed to it.

My student employment that year was as secretary in the BSU office. this made carrying out my duties as Secretary of the Executive council much simpler. Mrs. Joe Simmons was our Director and Dick Norton was President. Dick had “discovered” me during our Freshman year and was responsible for my becoming actively involved in campus activities. I served as campaign manager for several people running for campus offices. They usually lost. I also served as Secretary of the International relations Club during the first semester and reporter for Life Service Band in the second semester.

Between semesters I was part of a large youth revival team that went to Grand Avenue Baptist Church in Fort Smith, where the Rev. Jim Pleitz was pastor. Gerald Perry preached and Ben led the music. I think there must have been ten of us on the team. I helped to direct the visitation and train the young people for personal witnessing. The experience was beneficial to me in many ways, but its greatest benefit was in reminding me of the importance of adequate spiritual preparation for leading young people–or anyone.

In March, I attended the Missions Conference at Southwestern Baptist Seminary in Fort Worth Texas. These days marked a turning point in my life. Bill Lawson made me painfully aware of my racial prejudice and of the limitations It placed on my effectiveness as a witness for Christ. My concept of missions was reshaped by the testimonies of the many missionaries I heard. I found myself thinking more intelligently about how my life would fit into God’s plan for sharing the gospel with the world. One bit of advice offered by one of the missionaries still serves to awaken me to the opportunities for witnessing all around me. It was “If you don’t do it here, you probably wouldn’t do it there.” Back in Little Rock for the summer I worked at Calvary for two weeks while the church secretary was on vacation. Then I was fortunate enough to be able to work in the License Bureau at the State Capitol.

My Senior year began with a BSU pre-school retreat. It was there that I really became friends with Barbara Corrington (now Mrs. Jack Tolar, Jr.) Our friendship was to deepen with many experiences shared throughout the year. I had been elected President of the campus YWA and that year was filled with activities related to the office. We had a successful Big Sister-Little Sister party at the beginning of the year. We also sponsored the Lottie Moon Week of Prayer and Offering on the campus. This was a most rewarding experience, although it was not as successful as I had prayed that it might be. My mistakes, which were numerous gave me a more realistic self-concept. It was in November of that year at the BSU state convention in Hot Springs that I became convinced that God was calling me to prepare for overseas mission service. I made my decision public in the final service of the convention and wrote to Miss Dawkins of the Foreign Mission Board after I returned to the campus informing her of my decision.

Dormitory life was an important factor in the process of my education. I enjoyed it although I was not always blessed with the ideal roommates or neighbors. Even then I thought it was just possible that I was not the ideal roommate or neighbor. Our room somehow became the gathering place for whatever floor or wing we were living on. I like to think that the handy half gallon of peanut butter which we always kept on hand had nothing to do with our popularity.

During my Senior year my roommate, Lillie McKnight was President of the Women’s Student Government and I was Secretary of the same group. This really frustrated our Resident Counselor because she didn’t know who to bring us up before when we had midnight pizza parties in the basement kitchen or moved the giant Christmas tree from the first floor parlor to the third floor. I was grateful that the Dean of Students had a sense of humor.

One of my responsibilities in WSG was to plan and direct the receptions following student recitals. At the end of the year I could have written a book on making punch. My favorite was the one to which I forgot to add sugar. Had it been the Religion faculty instead of the Music faculty I probably would have been dismissed from school for spiking the punch.

My student employment was as secretary in the Student Senate office., Dick Norton had been elected President of the Student Body and I was looking forward to working with him again. However, he was stricken with meningitis in the early weeks of school and we had to hold another election. Unfortunately, I served as a campaign manager for the loser (again) and working with his opposition was not the most pleasant task I have every had. Happily, at our last meeting we had a good laugh about our differences and parted friends.

Our BSU director that year was Linda Day, who had graduation from Ouachita the year before. We had become fairly close friends during my Junior year, even though she always managed to start dating everyone I expressed an interest in. I had attended the Missions Conference at Southwestern Seminary again, and came away convinced that I should serve as a BSU Summer Missionary. At the Council meeting where we were to elect the nominees from our campus, there was almost unanimous agreement that I should be one of those selected. I say almost because Linda Day was not of the same persuasion, and of course those whom she suggested were chosen.. this probable was one of my greatest disappointments. I did feel much better about it when the boys from our campus were selected and served so well.

This must have been my year of “pert nigh but not plumb,” as we say in Arkansas. I was nominated for Who’s Who, but missed it by one point. I was selected to represent our class in the competition for Queen of Play Day. The queen was chosen on the basis of the number of points her class accumulated in the activities during the day. We tied with the Junior Class and I had to share the “honor” with their representative.

As graduation neared I began to wish that I had the security of a teaching certificate. I knew that I needed to work for a year or two before going to seminary. Since Ouachita offered only a few very general courses in Religious Education, I was not very well prepared to assume a position in a church. However, I did go to Beech Street Baptist Church in Texarkana as part of a revival team with the possibility of being called as youth director. the committee seemed interested and contacted me several times after that weekend. It seemed fairly certain that they would call me, but at graduation time, I had not neard from them. The same church was considering my roommate Lillie, as organist, and she was having the same experience with them as I was having. I received a phone call from the chairman of the committee about three or four weeks after graduation. After I assured him that I definitely would not be going to seminary in the Fall, he assured me that it was all but settled. I never heard from them again.